I succeeded, after years, to write a love poem and I read it to him when he needed it most

The Reprieve or The Gist

You were the reprieve
That I didn't’t know I’d need
I was strumming along the way that I do
My head stuck up my ass
Too determined about my studies
And my ever-self improvement
And then there was you.

You had the balls to frankly say you liked me
And you adamantly said there was something to be
I, of course, was too wrapped up in my new goals
To pause, sit down, and marinate my feelings over you.

Less than a month later it punched me in the face
So hard in fact that it pushed me flat on the ground
And with a gut feeling, that you, only you, my dear
Was the right man to catch me.

You were the reprieve
That I didn’t know I’d need
I was strumming along the way that I do
My head stuck up my ass
Too determined about my studies
And my ever-self improvement
And then there was you.

I then search for you, longed for you, and craved you
I posted a fucking ad on Craig’s list in my hunt to find you
I asked everyone I could think of, repeatedly, if they knew of some way to contact you

You were in my head at full volume sitting there in pause
Onto which the volume button pleaded
“Just go ahead and allow yourself to love me!”
All I had left to do was swear and glare at that button,
As if attempting to dare it, to go ahead, and press its damn self.

You were the reprieve
That I didn’t know I’d need
I was strumming along the way that I do
My head stuck up my ass
Too determined about my studies
And my ever-self improvement
And then I saw you…

You were at the library, disheveled yet sexy like how you do.
I managed to control myself enough not to run up and jump on you with a hug
Exclaiming “it was meant to be that you’d pop up!”
I played it cool and there were many hugs and many cheek kisses
I told you how much I missed you, worried about you, and thought about you all this time.

It was a brief two minutes and then you had to go, and
You promised to call me before I’d have the chance to call you.
I woke up the next morning to text messages on my phone,
That were sent outrageously early in the morning
And thought to myself ‘damn this man sure has some quality’

From texting all day long I wondered to myself
‘Is this some sort of dream? Like a fucked up fairy tale
Happening to two ordinary simple beings?’
Could this actually be? Were you that reprieve?

That night I invited myself to the planetarium show,
Freshly showed, feeling sexy, and all spruced up.
Driving there I kept daring myself to seize this opportunity
And in the dark of the theatre I made the first move.

On the inside I was freaking out, thinking you wouldn’t feel the same anymore
That I’d be sued or kicked out of NAMI for some sort of sexual harassment lawsuit.
I, having absolutely no experience in making The Move
Very slowly inched my hand to yours and you reciprocated,
And damn did our interlocking fingers feel good.

That night we drove to a deserted park
And again, having no experience whatsoever in Making the Move
That I used some cheesy pick up line about it being St Patty’s day
Saying that since you weren’t wearing green I’d have to kiss you –
Well that certainly failed for you pointed out that you were, in fact, wearing green.

But our faces were close enough or you simply figured out my lame attempt to hit on someone,
That we had our first kiss…and we kissed… and we kissed… and we kissed.
And there wasn’t any kind of kisses with the sense of ‘damn, you so fine, I’d tap it right here, right now’--
It was soft, simple, delicate, and pure… we weren’t even sucking face

We took breaks to hug and hold each other, to whisper back and forth,
To kiss each other’s faces and necks, and even sweeping our faces across the others
Basking in the caress that we had longed for.
It felt so good, and it felt so right, I wanted it to go on all night.
It was like I could crawl into your skin and be completely taken in.
And yeah, it would have been interesting had it gone on all night.

I knew you were that reprieve, that something I really need
I knew all that self help stuff, would mean be diddly shit, if I didn’t have someone to love.
Then you were the hesitant one, and I used every articulate honest word I could
To prove to you that I care you for unconditionally, come whatever that may lay
That I’m a good, strong-minded, honest woman that wouldn’t judge you in any way.

The next day you left, not intentionally, but you did
I do my best to keep my solemn promise and my word
To care for you unconditionally and not judge in anyway.
I get frustrated sometimes, sure, but the gist will always be the same.

The gist is that I long for you, that you feel like another half of me right now
That gist that I will never judge you, you’re so ever beautiful just the way you are
The gist that you’re exactly what I need, and the challenge to really honestly succeed
That gist that I love you, and will love you, in some sort of degree, forever.

Benny Boy, you’re my ever encompassing reprieve,
You’ve given me a sense of hope that I had no idea that I’d need
I’m here, standing for you and up for you, until you kick me out…
I wanna yell out to the world – that I may be new but I’m significant and
I’m not going anywhere, anytime soon!

~~~~~
Will you be my seeing-eye dog for I am blind?
Because you take me there, every time
With that winning combination of loyal and kind
You eyes show like wells of the water of your mind

I want to take a long, cool drink from that bucket
To every thought I could have now... I say fuck it
I just want to go with how I feel
Like my only job here,
Is to care for,
And covet you,
My dear….